Mastering the Art of Public Speaking

 

Speaking in public can be a daunting challenge that many of us face at some point in our lives. The stage can turn into a blank canvas, leaving us frozen and anxious. However, it is a challenge that must be embraced and conquered. In this article, we will explore valuable suggestions and tips to help you become a better public speaker. Join me on this journey as we uncover the mistakes you may have been making and learn how to improve your public speaking skills.

The Power of Delivery

When it comes to public speaking, we often focus too much on what we want to say rather than how we say it. While content and words are important, research shows that only 7% of communication relies on them. Surprisingly, the remaining 93% is dependent on our voice and body language. This statistic emphasizes the significance of mastering our delivery. Just like a text message, your body language sets the tone for your speech and greatly influences the audience’s perception.

  • Content and words contribute only 7% to effective communication.
  • Voice carries 38% of the message, while body language holds 55%.
  • Body language acts as a text message, conveying emotions and intentions.

Building a Positive Connection

To establish a strong connection with your audience, it is crucial to create a positive and pleasant atmosphere. Your body language and voice play a vital role in achieving this. Avoid hurting the sentiments of your listeners and instead focus on delivering your speech in a positive and joyful manner.

  • Negative body language can hinder your relationship with the audience.
  • Concentrate on how you say things, rather than just what you say.
  • Ensure your body language and voice reflect a positive demeanor.

Engaging Your Audience

To make a lasting impression, it is important not only to captivate your audience but also to leave a positive impact. Utilizing examples, anecdotes, and relatable experiences can significantly enhance your speech. By connecting your topic to daily life, you help your audience relate and engage with your message. Additionally, maintaining eye contact with your listeners establishes a deeper connection.

  • Meaningful eye contact creates a stronger connection with the audience.
  • Incorporate examples and personal experiences to make your speech relatable.
  • Use anecdotes to illustrate your points effectively.

Captivating Beginnings

The start of your speech holds great importance in capturing the audience’s attention. To ensure a strong opening, present yourself confidently and with authority. Lay your notes on the podium, hold your head high, and greet your listeners with a warm smile. A well-crafted and attention-grabbing phrase can work wonders in establishing an immediate connection with the audience.

  • Project confidence and control to gain the audience’s trust.
  • Begin with a clear and powerful phrase that resonates with the audience.
  • Use humor and intriguing statements to capture attention.

Mastering Body Language

Body language is a powerful tool that can either enhance or hinder your speech. Pay attention to your posture and chin placement to convey confidence. Avoid slouching or standing too rigidly, as both extremes can send the wrong message. Practice in front of a mirror to find the most appropriate body posture that reflects poise and self-assurance.

  • Maintain an upright posture to exude confidence.
  • Avoid slouching, which may indicate lack of preparation.
  • Find a balanced chin position that conveys composure.

Common Mistakes to Avoid

While delivering a public speech, certain actions should be avoided to ensure a polished performance. Be mindful of the following pitfalls:

  • Avoid looking down or off into empty space; maintain meaningful eye contact.
  • Refrain from speaking before reaching the front of the room; start when you are comfortable and ready.
  • Resist playing with your hair, leaning on one side, or using distracting hand gestures.
  • Do not fold your arms, cross your legs, sway from side to side, or turn your back to the audience.

The Power of Confidence

Above all, confidence is paramount in delivering an impactful speech. Without confidence, all other tips and techniques may fall short. Believe in yourself and your abilities, and speak with courage and conviction. Embrace these suggestions and practice them alongside cultivating unwavering confidence.

  • Confidence is the key to successful public speaking.
  • Believe in yourself and your message.
  • Speak with conviction and courage.

In conclusion, mastering the art of public speaking requires attention to both content and delivery. While preparing your speech is important, equally crucial is how you present yourself through body language and voice. Establishing a positive connection with your audience, captivating their attention from the start, and maintaining confidence throughout are essential elements of successful public speaking. With practice, anyone can become a compelling and confident public speaker. So embrace the challenge, refine your skills, and captivate your audience with your newfound abilities.

The Art of Public Speaking: Lessons in Grace, Credibility, and Resonance

Introduction

Have you ever been asked to speak in front of a large audience and share personal or professional stories to inspire and ignite creative action? For many of us, the idea of public speaking can be daunting. However, public speaking is a skill that can be honed and mastered with practice. In this article, we will explore the lessons in public speaking, focusing on the key elements of grace, credibility, and resonance.

Embracing Vulnerability: The Journey of a Speaker

Before diving into the intricacies of public speaking, let’s take a moment to understand the author’s personal journey. Born with a hearing impairment, the author had to undergo speech therapy during their formative years. They also faced multiple surgeries related to their ears, leaving them with a speech deficiency. Ironically, the author has now become a speaker who helps others find their voice. This serves as a reminder that even superheroes have their flaws. The author’s journey has led them to discover the importance of listening in effective speaking.

The Power of Listening: Grace in Public Speaking

When it comes to public speaking, grace is not just about what you say; it’s also about how you say it. Physicality plays a significant role in delivering a great talk. The author shares their experiences working with clients and highlights some common pitfalls to avoid. Here are a few aspects of grace discussed:

Feet: The Soft Rock Star Pose

– Some speakers tend to walk excessively or exhibit awkward movements on stage.
– The author introduces the \”soft rock star pose\” as a solution, encouraging speakers to stand strong and firm before speaking.
– This posture helps minimize distractions caused by excessive movement or the urge to wander.

Body: Swiveling and Gestures

– Swiveling, a subtle movement some speakers unknowingly exhibit, can be distracting.
– Friends and colleagues can provide valuable feedback to speakers who may not be aware of their swiveling habit.
– The use of hand gestures can be powerful, but excessive or repetitive gestures can detract from the message.
– Speakers who experience nervous shaking can find comfort by giving their hands a purpose, such as holding a clicker or a hanky.

Scripts: The Pitfall to Avoid

– Many speakers rely on scripts, but they can hinder effective delivery.
– Using a script often leads to visible shaking, as seen when speakers hold a piece of paper.
– Eye contact with the audience is compromised when the speaker constantly looks down at the script, amplifying their nervousness.

Credibility: Crafting Compelling Stories

In addition to grace, credibility plays a vital role in engaging an audience. It involves the content of your speech, the stories you choose to tell, and how you deliver them. Here are some key points to consider:

– Storytelling: Stories have the power to captivate and connect with the audience emotionally.
– Models and Frameworks: Utilizing effective storytelling models and frameworks can enhance the impact of your message.
– Authenticity: Revealing vulnerability and personal insights can make your speech more relatable and memorable.

Resonance: Leaving an Impact

Resonance refers to the audience’s response and emotional experience during and after a speech. It involves leaving a lasting impression and evoking a specific feeling or action. Consider the following aspects of resonance:

– Emotional Connection: Maya Angelou’s famous quote highlights the significance of how people feel after listening to a speech.
– Audience Engagement: Great speakers focus on understanding and addressing the needs, desires, and emotions of their audience.
– Inspiring Action: A powerful speech should motivate listeners to take action or implement positive changes in their lives.

Conclusion

Public speaking is an art that requires the mastery of grace, credibility, and resonance. By understanding the importance of physicality, choosing compelling stories, and connecting with the audience on an emotional level, anyone can become a more effective speaker. Remember, it’s not just about what you say, but how you say it that truly leaves a lasting impact. So, the next time you find yourself standing in front of a hundred unfamiliar faces, embrace the opportunity to share your voice and inspire others through the power of public speaking.

How To Master The Art of Public Speaking

This is kept hanging and welcome to master the art of public speaking the webinar. This is five minutes early and as we’re getting in, I just want to say: welcome, happy birthday, happy Thursday, I’m also on my phone checking the the app out of GoToWebinar to see how it actually looks like from the app so you’re watching from the app.

Let me know how it goes, but welcome. I’M very I’m very excited that you are here today to improve and work on your public speaking skills, and one thing I do have to say: if you are reaching watching a replay of this, we will get started in five minutes.

If you are live with us right now, I just want to welcome the people. That’S on with us: hey Cynthia Jenny, Nerissa, no VC, my apologies! No VC! You have Sarah Suzanne welcome everyone. I know most of you are tuning in on the computer, and one thing I have to say is that I made a little boo-boo when I was registering this event, so we we could have chosen on the go-to webinar page, something called a webcast or webinar, and They said a webcast people don’t have to download as many things so I chose webcast, but one of the downsides to webcast, as I found out that I was doing my live webinars yesterday, or that people cannot actually chat in the chat that you can only see And so, as a speaker, how do you adapt to these different situations? You have to be able to know that you still have to go on, and so one thing that I would love to say is that later on, we will have a practice session in the middle of this webinar, and so I always like to get audience interaction.

So I am going to put down my phone number, eight five, seven, seven, five, three, eight two one one and I would love for you to text me later on, but also, if you have some time right now, it’s to put my phone number in your phone And save my name to it because – and this actually turns out better because later on, I will love for you to go: hey Cerie text, kit, okay and they’ll, say what do you want to say during this part or have your own Android? During this part, I actually want you to speak in because we will have a practice part, and so he can actually speak in and the text will go in or you can also text me too, but just to try something right now.

How are you guys feeling text me? 8. 5. 7. 7. 5. 3. 8. 2. 1. 1. How are you are you excited for the upcoming training? How are you feeling, maybe it’s a Thursday in Boston? It’S not really raining, but it’s a little bit gloomy.

But how are you feeling 8, 5. 7. 7. 5. 3. 8. 2. 1. 1 text me we’ll be starting in two minutes. I hope you will have your notebooks out. I know that on a webinar, it’s harder to focus because you might have your phone there.

You might, of course I want you to use your phone. You might have all these other things there, but Tanuja is try to get all your distractions away as much as possible, because if you are investing your time to improving your public speaking skills that I’m gonna say how can you be here? A hundred percent? Okay.

So we’re gonna get started in one minute again. The chat is not working. So please text comment and interact with me on my phone at eight five, seven, seven, five, three, eight two one one and if you have any questions along the way later on during the end of this webinar, we’ll have a Q & A period.

So if you have any questions along the way, please text me your questions beforehand. So when we get right into the Q & A period, we’re gonna dive right in kno-ec said you’re feeling row that I’m feeling I’m excited for this training.

Thank you for texting. Okay, it is 11:00 a.m. let’s get started promptly. So again the chat is not working. Please text comment and interact with me on my phone at eight five, seven, seven, five, three, eight two one one and one of the best lessons that you know just from learning of this chat situation.

I was listening to a podcast and on the podcast they were interviewing Penn & Teller. You know that the magician, and so they asked them. Well, what do you do if your magic tricks fail on stage like what do they do and they said they had to keep their composure and literally just say: hey, you know all magic tricks doesn’t work.

Let’S move on to the next one right, the best speaker if they know how to take their failures or the things that might mess up in a moment but fit and treat it like nothing happened, but the show has to go on so, let’s get started everyone.

I’M excited that you are here. Let me know how you’re feeling by texting me at eight five, seven, seven, five, three, eight two one one so welcome everyone to master the art of public speaking. You can become a confident, clear and compelling speaker to maximize your career growth and the Robie down to how you communicate and how you speak in public.

So you are in the right place. If you are someone looking to advance your career, but maybe you’re feeling held back because of your public speaking skills, maybe you get stuck in your head. Maybe you get a little bit nervous or maybe it’s something about speaking up.

Maybe it’s just finding your voice. Maybe you don’t feel you can be your authentic self in these situations. Now it doesn’t have to be a public speaking to a hundred people situation. It could be maybe you’re in a meeting right and you’re in the right place.

If, for example, you have an upcoming presentation and you do not feel a hundred percent prepared – and maybe you do need some help getting ready for it, and maybe you have received some feedback from others – maybe your boss, your colleagues, your friends or even even your family Member and they said hey, we think you should.

You know work on your public speaking or maybe you just feel out of place and out of practice, and you just want to beef up your skills just to blow it up blow it up right. So I just want to say thank you for taking the time here today and right now.

If you are really invested in improving your public speaking, please get rid of the distractions that you have try to tune in as much as possible, because I want to give you a lot of good nuggets and good information today that you can take away and use.

So here’s what you’ll learn today number one: how to develop your mindset to speak with confidence and authority number two, the number one secret that great speakers and presenters have in common and later on, during the middle of our webinar.

This is really really fat this. So I want to give you some actionable tips to be more memorable, engaging in persuasive and yes, you can also write in your notebook, but what I would love later on is for you to really interact with me and really practice this, because look if you want To get better at public speaking, it’s kind of like riding a bicycle: you have to get on the bike and do it number four, let’s help you build a speaker gameplan, and I will also let you know how we can also continue to work together.

If you would like to to continue your growth in public speaking and at the the last 15-20 minutes, I want to open this webinar up for Q & A so. If you have any questions along the way, please text me again: eight five, seven, seven: five 381.

One because when we get to the Q & A, I would just love to jump into the questions. So just a little bit about myself, I never used to teach public speaking, of course, that I did not grow up thinking.

Oh, I want to teach public speaking because if we have not met before you probably don’t know that I’m an introvert this this one t-shirt, I’m planning to get it says introverted but willing to discuss cats.

I always used to be shy back in college. I in high school, you know just growing up if I was at sitting in the classroom. Just like this. Just like this photo and of the teacher were to say, hey who wants to speak up, I would hesitate every single time to just try to raise my hand or just speak up, because I thought, oh maybe I had an accent.

Maybe I didn’t know what to say so really I hesitated to speak up almost every single time and I was beating myself up and also back then I did not tell stories for me. I thought stories were for the movies for Netflix.

You know for public speakers. I thought my life was mundane, I thought well, why tell stories. I just have a normal life and also when I come to persuasion and influence. I did not even think that was possible.

I didn’t occur to me in my mind that people can actually learn these things, such as persuasion, and so there was one day I was walking across campus and there was a flyer that for a public speaking competition and on Miss flyer, it says: okay, three thousand Dollars for the winner, and of course I did it for the money, so I entered the competition, but I never practiced as hard as I did for this.

I spent almost a week from like 5 p.m. or 10 p.m. to going up to 2 a.m. almost every single day preparing for that competition and and and and during the practice. For example, I would say I would go to the the chapel where it was held and I would do my body language over and over again.

So, for example, I’m turning on the video I would say to myself and I will try to look out to the audience and even the introduction I would say hey my name is Kip hang and I would do that motion over and over again, and I would Do this for the whole speech, I was a good morning.

Everyone. My name is Kip pang, it’s kind of like choreography good morning. Everyone, my name is Kip ping. I would. I was also playing with the voice to. I was just not memorizing it, but I I the way I practice was good morning.

My name is Kip Aang. Now, if I did not like this, the way that sentence sounded, I would say it in a different way. Maybe I said it faster good morning. My name is Kip pang, maybe I slowed it a little bit down, so it just wasn’t memorizing it.

But when I got on stage during the day of something magical happened to me, I time kind of slowed down and I felt like I was in the zone. I looked at people in the eyes and I saw them looking back at me.

I saw the heads nodding, they were smiling and they seemed very enthusiastic about what I was saying and in that moment I felt it. I’M not sure if you ever felt like you were in the zone, but I felt I was in the public speaking zone and that experience actually transferred over to all my other areas of life.

Speaking up in class, helping me to speak to people even starting. My business I felt like because I was able to find my voice public speaking, changed my life, but what you have to what I realized was that public speaking actually started my life.

It was it it was like a second life and thanks to public speaking and that’s why I’m doing the things that I’m doing now, I love to help people with improving your public speaking skills. I was lucky enough to even give a TEDx talk on listening in.

In the middle picture, you can see that right now I love and I enjoy public speaking so much not just because it’s good to be in the spotlight, but it’s it’s. So it gives me a lot of joy to be able to help and transform others.

No man matter of this is and and a business setting or an informal setting, but the ability to to be with others and be here in a moment and help others grow to mean. That is that gives me fulfillment and what I realized after helping a lot of different people in different organizations.

It’S that we all have the same challenges when it comes to public speaking and so maybe you’re here today, because when you register for the webinar there was a question at the end and says: what’s your biggest public speaking challenge, some people might say it’s nervousness or Maybe it’s a lack of focus.

Some people said to it my contact or it’s the delivery. It’S it’s a ability to persuade others to take action right. So no matter who we are ranked does not matter money does not matter. There are some people like CEOs they’re in a high position, but there’s still super nervous when they have to speak each time or maybe you’re looking to rise up in your career and you’re comfortable, maybe maybe right now.

Your next step is to work on your persuasion skills, so there are actually five levels to master when it comes to public speaking, the first level. I call these people with the stuck in your head speakers right now.

What they need is that self confidence. Yes, you might be confident in other areas of life, but when it comes to public speaking, what happens to you? Sometimes you get stuck in your head now it doesn’t have to be public speaking standing up, maybe you’re in the boardroom, and there are other impressive people or maybe at some meeting and there’s some impressive people, and then you start thinking or what.

If I mess up. Oh, what if I do this right so when I was younger, I was in the middle school. I was trying to tap this this this this beat to this music. You know doing stuff like this and this kid came over and the kid said to me.

I was not exactly this, but he was like well. Why are you making that noise? Well? What is that – and I remember I’m like oh I’m, trying I’m trying to tap out this this this beat to the music. That’S played and he’s like.

No man, not that’s not it is this tapping random stuff out, and so he did. He did his version right, which was to the music, and then he did my version and here’s the thing. My version, I had a beat inside my head that I was tapping.

I was actually not listening to what was going on in the environment. I was actually kind of stuck in my head and I thought this was what was real to me, but to everyone else. It was not real, and this is what happens to the stuck in your head speakers.

All these things happen, but is not happening in reality, right that the art of overthinking is the art of creating problems that don’t exist. Okay, the next level is, the attention grab. Grab a speaker: they these people start developing their presence.

If you see these people, they will have good body language, their voice is very powerful or they start working on the voice. For example, I have a friend who is a voice actress and last time I was in a meeting with her this.

This one lady was speaking, but then my friend who’s a voice, actress that started speaking, but she started speaking everyone’s had to start a turning. It is because that the power of her voice can pound them.

So if you have great presence, if you have great delivery, if you have that good body, language and voice that will grab attention right from the beginning in the next level, the valuable speaker – and this is what I want to talk about being clear and memorable.

Most of the time we are so strapped fatah for time we go to meetings or presentations and we do things last-minute. When we get there, we actually do not know what our takeaways are. Do you know what I mean it’s like we’re, trying to figure it out along the way and then and then the other people are trying to figure it out along the way too, and so sometimes during presentations.

We don’t know what really? What are we trying to get across most of the time people don’t know, and if our ideas are not clear for us, how would it be clear to other people now, when I say being clear to is actually just not the specific word choice that you use Really can you in the last ten minutes that I spoke, can you repeat back a certain sentence that I said verbatim: it’s good, it’s very hard, but I want to show you that, sorry that the idea is out there.

So here’s the thing about being memorable nowadays. It’S really important to be memorable, because if you took two weeks or two hours to prepare for a presentation and you go into that meeting what if they don’t remember anything you just took two weeks or two days or two months to prepare for this, and nothing Is sticky enough that the audience is saying Wow? I will remember this, and this happens more often than you think.

Maybe you’ve been into a bunch of presentations and you’ve seen a 60 minute presentation. But then, when you walk out the door or read or even right after the presentation, you go on your phone and you forgot all about it.

You’Re like okay. What’S that takeaway right, maybe sometimes they give you too much information and you don’t even know what is sticky in your head. So when you are clear – and you are memorable, people will say wow that content is valuable.

Thank you so much the next level and I hope you go. I hope you are liking this. So far, the next level you become the heartfelt speaker. You start resonating with the audience. It’S just it’s just not education anymore, but again it’s not just opening people’s minds.

You know something sometimes people say wow. That blew my mind. Well, if you are a heartfelt speaker, people will say wow that blew my heart away. Wow right, they don’t even have words to express it because it touches them.

People will be thinking, wow, you’re speaking directly to me to my heart. Thank you so much. It’S like watching a good movie you’re like wow, emotionally you’re laughing one second you’re, crying the Knicks and and these heartfelt speakers they really get to you deep inside again.

It’S just not education anymore, now, they’re reaching a different level, so after you’re able to speak to people’s hearts to resonate with them to relate with them. The next level you influence. This is what I call the level that transform of speaker, because it could be hot felt.

It could be clear, but if you are transformative speaker, people will start taking action based off of your perspectives. Okay, now I’m not saying influencing them to do bad stuff, but it’s influenced them influencing them to help them progress in their life or if this is a business situation, people are adapting your perspective and it’s growing the business.

Okay, it’s growing it’s helping as they like. Your solution, or they like their ideas for that problem on this opportunity, and so these are the five levels to master when it comes to public speaking, that all individuals will come across no matter if you, if they make a lot of money, no matter what the Ranks are, it varies, and these the next thing I want to talk about on the biggest mistakes that most people do in each of these levels number one when it comes to self-confidence, it’s not listening to now.

What did I mean by that again when, when, when that Rene is a certain situation, we get in our heads when we get into our heads we’re not in the moment I have a my yoga teacher said when you’re stuck in your head, you’re dead.

Also, my meditation teacher said we have two kinds of thoughts, thoughts in the past and thoughts in the future. When we’re here, we have no thoughts. Really. The best speaker is the best presenters they hear creating the moment with you.

So when we get in our heads what happens we’re not really paying attention to what’s going on in our reality? Just like that example, I gave you earlier of me tapping out the DES beat to the music. I was so in my head.

Nothing was going on that that music was not playing. I mean that that music was playing, but I wasn’t listening to it right. I wasn’t listening to that now. I was just listening to my head. The second mistake: when it comes to presence people, don’t know how to work the room most often is because people are stuck to technology.

Well, what do I mean by their being stuck to technology? Let’S say they have a pot. Let’S say they have a pump for my slide, maybe they so they have to say. Oh, I have to keep on looking at this PowerPoint slide or maybe they’re just stuck to the podium itself.

I’M not saying you have to move around and walk around and rock the room, but the best presenter is a feels like hmm, even if they have a PowerPoint, they have that presence in the room because they know how to keep eye contact.

They know how to do the body language, it feels natural, so they work in the room; rather they can walk around or even if you’re, on a webinar. There are some people who shine really really well, because if this is on video, they know how to just talk to you.

Maybe they’re looking at you go through the camera and you can feel their presence with you in a way and that’s what I mean by work in the room that people, sometimes they don’t have that good delivery that, like all men, what do I do? I have all these technology issues.

Oh man, I have all these notes. You know sometimes they’re stuck in the notes, they’re stuck in the technology and so and the other thing too. It’S working the room is adapting to the room. If things messes up mess up, how can you just adapt to the moment so the next mistake, no planning or having a structure to your content, and this will really help help you be more clear and memorable again.

The planning is taking the time to know what your ideas are, and but here’s the thing too, when people make presentations and feels like people are doing it every single time with a different way. Now it doesn’t have to be that way.

It’S kind of like baking. You know once you bake it, you have a recipe for it, but people feel like. Oh I’m gonna make muffins I’m gonna start doing this muffin recipe, I’m gonna. Do it differently every single time.

Sometimes people treat presentations like that. I said. Oh this. Next presentation: it’s like making a new muffin. What do I have? What do I need, and so what I help my clients with in my programs, are all the basically step-by-step structures or open structure that you can use to make your presentation great, every single time but being clear memorable is all about planning and having good structure when It comes to real estate, you know what they say: real estate is about location, location, location, public speaking is all about planning planning, planning, okay planning.

What you’re, gonna say, planning how you’re going to say it, because if you do that, when you’re getting really most people are nervous because they don’t take the time to plan. Therefore, when they get into a situation.

They’Re, like oh, I just spent ten minutes on this. Oh, I don’t know my content. I really have to really just you know, work it out the next biggest mistake when people try to resonate with others, it does come back to knowing how to use the art of storytelling, but when people sometimes tell stories, they have no point.

I know many of you have sat in meetings or presentations and maybe you’re thinking, that’s a good story ten minutes ago. But what do you actually want to tell us with that story? Maybe they go off into a tangent? Maybe – and you know, when you talk too much, you know when you talk too much, and sometimes you even want to stop yourself, but then you don’t stop yourself in the moment, so people when they try to resonate with others.

Sometimes they share too much or people. Don’T understand why the sharing in the first place and lastly, when it comes to influence many individuals, rather focus on giving a lot of content and education rather than making them decide to take action.

Here’S what I mean have you ever tried to email, someone and say: hey. Can I pick your brain or maybe someone asks you on coffee, they say hey. Can I get your advice, or can I pick your brain on this and maybe you’re at that coffee chat and for that thirty minutes or for that one hour or two hours or even longer, sometimes you give them your best content.

You say: hey here’s! My experience. Here’S the advice, here’s the content, do this, do that and in the meeting they’re shaking their heads and then okay, one year later, you see the same person again and you asked him hey.

Did you take action on this? This is listen this. What’S my feedback valuable and they said? Oh hey, you know thank you for your time, but I decided to go on another route and you’re like hey. You know that the two hours thirty minutes, whatever time I took you to you know you gave them your content.

Your advice, but they didn’t use any of it and I’m sure this happens on a more daily basis and the thing is sometimes they has a thing. They did not decide to take action based off of your education, so if you really want to help influence people, it’s helping them decide to make a decision sometimes well in our life right now we have Google, we have YouTube.

We have all the information that we want, but it’s the inability to take action on the right steps. That’S when we get paralyzed and not grow. It’S kind of, like you know, having a wish list on on Amazon.

People will put a bunch of things on there, but they will probably never buy them because they make the decision that they need it right now in their life, so people who can persuade they help others and say hey.

This is so important in your life. Right now you need to take action on it and that’s kind of maybe why you’re here today, maybe because public speaking is important to you and you decided to take action on it right.

You need to be able to say hey. I have yeah, of course, we’re so busy, but as making, for example, public speaking you’re one of your priorities in in your life right now, and so as I’m saying this, if any of you have any questions along the way, please again feel free to text me.

Eight five, seven, seven, five, three eight two one, one, four for Q & A a little bit later on and again the chat is not working so also you can also text me. Where do you think you are I’m going back to the structure? Really you text me: where do you think you are at this this these levels? Right now, maybe you’re, maybe you’re the stuck in your head speaker? Maybe you have great presents in delivery, maybe you’re working on taking the time to plan, or maybe you feel like.

Oh yeah, I’m imaginating. Of course we can all work on every single one of these, usually in these steps. Usually these are the steps that people take to to build off one another. We will go back and forth as an individual self confidence being able to.

You know influence, but ultimately, there’s being to that level, where you can become a transformative speaker where you can influence others. Let’S talk about your mindset for success when it comes to your mindset for success, it’s like that picture that you see the person that is speaking on left these situations, no matter if you have to speak on camera or you you’re the networking event, and then people Go around the room, then you have to introduce yourself or maybe it is that presentation where you have to do at work or another presentation that you have to do, and this is when the mindset comes in you’re like oh, hey, there’s a situation, that’s happening and We might get stuck in our heads.

One thing I want you to realize is that, for example, Olympians: they need to use their nervous energy all that energy to help them run ten times faster, to lift ten times more. The differences between great speakers and an average speakers is that great speakers or athletes or whoever they are, they know, and they need that energy to make them do that much better okay.

So when it comes to, when it comes to mindset for success, let’s say right now: you’re freaking up and people say you have to do this thing and you’re not ready. The first thing you really have to focus on is your breath.

What do I mean by your breath? There’S a great artist that once said, how do you know who’s the most confident person in the room, the person who knows how to control his or her breath? Because you know what happens, listen you’re, sitting around in the room and instead of a lion being in the room that that lion is public speaking, your body will start doing things like this, because you have this energy and maybe you don’t know how to release it.

It’S kind of like the guy was in yoga class, everyone is doing, they know the downward dog and the pump, and the instructor said please and everyone in the room you can hit them inhale exhale, because during a moment of tension, your your heart has your heart Is pumping adrenaline, you know, there’s adrenaline pumping boom boom boom boom boom, and so the unnatural way to really solve the nervousness is actually to take a pill and what this display do.

It stops adrenaline from pumping into your heart. So if you take this pill, I have a lion. Came in you’re gonna say: oh hey, kitty, nice kitty, nothing happens same thing of public speaking, but don’t do it there’s a lot of side effects.

Okay, the natural way to do this is to breathe. So whenever you feel like, oh you know, your heart is pumping. What I do is I’m manually, I put my hand on my heart and I tried to slow it down, and I still do this on.

Like the like two days ago, I was doing this story story slam and I get nervous myself too and so right before, even though I’m in the audience, sometimes you know a view and a work environment you’re not going to say pledge allegiance to America.

You know you’re, not gon, na put your hands on your on your heart, but how can you get focused back on your breath because what happens when you, when you believe you get back into the moment you get back into the now and it’s very powerful? And I know I know you probably know this too, but again it’s that constant reminder when you have that thought.

What, if I mess up, that trigger should be hmm instead of thinking. What, if I mess up, I’m just gonna focus on the breath. Right now, the second thing, if you want to set yourself up for for success, is to use your body language.

What do I mean by body language? I have a client and my client, for example, and she said whenever I sit in a room full of all men. Do you know what she does she hikes her chair up, so it’s the highest in the room or at eye level of everyone.

I was there because she said she said kid. How would how would I feel? How would I feel when I’m lower than everyone else, but it’s kind of like having a power outfit. You know when you have that power outfit on.

You feel good, and so that’s the same thing with your body language. So right now, if you’re sitting down or you’re driving when you’re standing up, maybe you just make your body a little bit taller right and in these moments when were anxious or nervous, or maybe we’re just freaking ourselves out? How can we make our body bigger kind of like well like when animals when they get frightened or when they fight they? You notice they make the body bigger to show confidence right, even though they might be freaking out inside in the head.

They’Re like oh man. This we have this bigger animal is gonna, come attack us well, they make themselves bigger and say: hey, I’m making myself, because I can seem more confident. So I can so. You can seem like I’m confident as well same exact thing with your body language.

So this will also knock you back into hmm knock you back into this moment, because if you have to fix the body language, you have to move something in your body and that will get you out of your head.

The last thing get a buddy. What what do I mean by body? It’S an external force? Okay, when I was at my so I do CrossFit. So every single time when I do CrossFit, there are a few moments. When I’m saying to myself, I only got two more reps and me nah man.

This is so heavy, but once in a while the coach will walk by it is and say kid do. Five more. You got it. Kit go, go five more! You got this. You got this, you know, keep on going, you got it and do you know what I do now? I only not do five more.

I might do like ten more so sometimes we need someone to knock us out of our mindset, because what we believe in might not be actually true right. Sometimes we need a friend. You need a support person.

Maybe it’s a colleague to say: hey, you got this, keep on going, keep on breathing, keep on pushing you. Maybe they need a shake. You shake you around. Sometimes we need to external force to help us get out of a hot mindset.

So the next time. These three things focusing on your breath, your body, language, head. Oh hey! Something too about the buddy, I’m not you! Don’T you don’t have to have an actual person. Maybe you can listen to a motivational youtube, video or maybe it could be a podcast to to get your mindset for success.

It could even be music. You know like like athletes before they go to the championship game. There might be on the bus listening to motivational music to pump themselves up for success right and so the next time you experience.

Maybe a shift in your mindset and you’re not feeling the best try. One of these things might your breath body language grabbing a buddy. So, let’s move on the number one secret that all great speakers have in common.

What do you think that is take a moment guess, but before we get into this, and I just want to read a few things that have been coming in hey Lila Lila said, I feel like I’m a little bit everywhere on the list of five levels.

Not quite yet transformative it’s when off the cuff. Yes, when Lila gets stuck so well, really, it’s good to know where you get stuck wheeler, because these are the things where you can just keep on working at it.

Another person said it might be due to trauma. I love public speaking, and this is something that goes a little bit deeper and thank you for for for for sharing this right, and so there’s a lot of moments where it might not even be just public speaking.

Something happened in our lives that might trigger into the way we speak for the way we handle ourselves when we are in front of others. So thank you for sharing and another person said and much eye contact.

I contact for them. You know everyone every new level. There’S a new devil, especially with public speaking. It can throw you a curveball just like that. But how can you here knows all these little tiny devil? It’S each time ends and stomp stomp up down? Okay, so the number one secret that all great speakers have in common.

If you look at the picture, it’s all about the audience. Well, what do I mean by that? Okay, most of the people that come to my workshops or my clients. Do you know what they ask like no there’s nothing wrong with what they ask the questions that they ask are mostly me related, I related.

How can I become a better speaker? How can I make better eye contact? How can I now there’s nothing wrong with asking? I we have to develop ourselves. That’S why you’re here today, but the best speakers there’s the speaker fence that I have for the most the speakers that are at the top of the game.

What I’ve noticed all the questions are audience related. For example, they might be asking hmm: how can my audience really get more takeaways from this presentation today? How can my audience feel more connected with me in the next 10 minutes? Is it because I have to give them? Why eye contact? You see you see the questions they’re asking or more audience related, but how can my? How can my audience really feel happy during my presentation? Because, because look if you were the audience right now, really think about it? Okay, if you’re sitting right now you’re if you’re watching this live on camera, will you be asking the questions of hey? Will kit look at the camera today and look at me or hey? Will kids be confident to give this presentation to me right more than what the questions that you have are probably how can I learn a little bit more about public speaking, so I can be more confident.

How can I you know these are the questions that you, the audience are asking no, probably never ask. What’S what’s kid doing with this hands motion, okay with Rick, where house house kids are set up for his webinar today you know you know I want to show you guys like I’m at home.

I have my computer on top of my a six shoe box. You know you were probably never asked these questions well, how its kids set up today. Did you see when it comes back to me? My question is: how can I give you the best one of the best presentations that you can get away it well and the question is: how can you stay throughout the whole presentation today? How can I engage you so that you can get more takeaways, and so when it comes to presentations before we get to practice time before when it comes to presentations, ask audience related questions and the best thing to, and if you noticed something about me, I like To get very interactive the best speakers, they use their audience to tell them what they need to do for the next steps, because some great speakers they look into people’s eyes when they speak or when they chat over them, and they can read the room.

Of course. That’S another skill by itself, but they know how to pay attention to the room, and I feel like that, what that’s what they have to do next, for example, when you have you ever sat in a presentation and your butt is hurting, do you know what happens When your butts are hurting, the speaker can also feel that everyone’s butts are hurting too.

But those speakers who just keep on going on and when they know everyone’s butts are hurting. They keep on going on, look they’re, prepared information. They forget to adapt and read the room because they forget to know how to use the audience.

The audience is there to help you not to know not to smush you the audience, even if, even though your presentation may be failing right did they’re there to like push you, you know like hey. You got this they’re, not that they’re the throw eggs at you right, so one of the best things that you can do if you need to start shifting.

Your mindset, like one of my mentor, has told me the quality of your life depends on the questions that you ask. Well, the quality of your presentation depends on the questions that you ask about your audience.

Okay, it’s like kind of being like an FBI, the more you ask questions about your audience, the more you can be engaging to them, the more you know about them. Therefore, the more you can speak to them at a heart level, influence level the head level, but we’ve all this said: let’s get down to my favorite time practice time.

Okay, so right now I’m gonna say this again: either you can text me. You can say hey, say text kit thanks, so either you can write in your notebook. Okay, because, okay, look, you can watch this webinar.

You can listen to it, but if you don’t take action to practice how you gonna get better. The first thing is something called prep, and this is what I one of my favorite things impromptu speaking. Presentation write this down, because this is not in the webinar.

The P stands for point which stands for your opinion. Okay, P is your opinion and I’ll demonstrate this later reason is your logic, your y example, your story. Okay, examples are your stories and you go back to your opinion.

Okay in the first place, so I want to give you a topic. I’M gonna demonstrate this for us. So let’s say I’m talking about the grocery store. Okay, PR ep: the point is man. You can finish this in for synthesis.

The grocery store that you go to really reflects back on your values and the reason it is some. You know some groceries, grocery stores are healthier than others because they sell different types of food.

For example, the other day I was really hungry and my wife said kit – do not go to Stop and Shop, because if you go to Stop and Shop they have those Lay’s potato chips or those chocolates and whatever else that they have.

I know you’re gonna get them, so let’s go to Whole Foods and get the things that we need right, and so you know it’s that it’s tiny, but the different types of grocery stores ruins your the way you want to live, and so the next time You go to a grocery store, really doesn’t reflect back on who you are? Maybe you want to be more healthy? Maybe you do want to have a little next time and you’re gonna star market.

Oh, I go to stop and shop for my Lay’s barbecue chips. So try that prep PR EP the topic is coffee. Okay, you can text it to me. You can write it down in your notebook and never share with me. You can see it just a serie and then still text it to me.

I would rather you say: hey kit, hey, say text kit coffee is one of the best things to have in the morning. The reason is, it will energize you. I remember the other day. I know you guys know what I’m getting to and what seriously start talking and then you can text it to me afterwards, but this is this is practice time, just like a fitness class you’re lifting right now, one of my participants who came to one of our Workshops, so I’m not sure if she’s on now, I don’t think he’s on so he gave me a cat basket and because she knows I love cats, so advice from the cats.

As you are doing this, I’m gonna read some of this advice from the cats focus on the cans, not the cants stay curious pounce on opportunities, think outside the box. So, as their examples are coming in, I’m gonna move on to the next practice, but really you’re taking this time to practice hair.

Oh I’m gonna give you another topic. If you finished that one another topic: cats, okay, try, the pep chants PEP or okay. Now you say: okay, this is so random. If you want to put this into more realistic terms, do it on one of your topics if you have a presentation coming up what’s so I get.

The point is your opinion? What’S that mini idea, or that I didn’t want to get a class right if this is work-related, maybe the idea is that well, everything is streamlined. We are in a good position.

Okay. That is the point right. You can say to everyone for the past six for the past year. Our our marketing has been really really good, then drop. The reason didn’t drop the example, but what’s the idea you want to get across, you see how we have to get clear on our ideas.

The reason and the example is only there to make your idea more memorable at the end of the day or do you have to use? Do you have to use this prep in the order? P re P? No, you don’t have to. You can go example.

First reason later point a little bit later, but as I sip some water, please take the time to to text me to write this out. I would love to read some of your responses a little bit later. I know it takes a little bit more time to text on the phone.

So again, I just want to say thank you for everyone. That’S that’s doing here any Carmen Cynthia, welcome person, Jenny, Hey Joe, how to go and Joe Joe Neal Lila. Thank you so much Lila you’re, awesome.

Everyone you’re awesome, Lucia Nick thanks for popping on Tony in Yaffe. Thank you so much. Okay, the next thing. Okay, here we go. This person says you can also text me, your name. You need passion to pursue your dreams without passion.

You will quit when things get difficult bill gates, wouldn’t work 17 hours a day, consecutive consecutive consecutively. If he wasn’t passionate about his work, oh hi, powerful. So again you see, there’s popkins is pool, go really really quick.

So, thank you for that. So I’m gonna I’m gonna move on to the next thing. So next thing is, I you and me. So what do I mean by that use? Different pronouns, I’m just gonna break down this example really quickly.

I’M gonna share I’ll talk about cats. Okay, I’m going to share everything about I and then same contexts use the word. You same content use the word. We are now we’re not going for perfection. We just were just practicing here.

So I have three cats and these three cats. They all have different personalities. I love my first cat because she’s like a princess, the second cat, she’s kind of like all over the place she had butts everyone in the third case he’s kind of like in the middle and at the beginning I thought cats would scratch.

I thought cats would bite. I thought there would be just oh, you know aloof, but they’re, not at the end of the day. I really started loving my cats. Now I’m gonna start over use. The word you I’m not sure about you or if you have any cats, maybe you think cats will scratch.

Maybe you think cats are just. You know, don’t bother me, but the thing is after after having cats, you have to realize some cats. They might just go up and headbutt you. You know how that would feel when they had, but you’ll feel loved that day.

That know it. You can cuddle with cats no matter if, for example, this these cats with their different personnel personalities, maybe one’s ester princess, maybe that princess it’s just like you – may be another one.

It’S all over the place. Maybe it’s like, like you too, so you have to know that cats are kind of like human beings. Just like you, so the next time you you see, cats, you can say: hey, I’m going to see you in a different light.

Okay, I must start over use the same content we all have maybe have seen. We all have seen cats in our lives and character, one of the most popular animals nowadays and I think they’re increasing both dogs and I I don’t think we all have cats, maybe some of us we do, but for the for the ones that we don’t.

I really want us to really think why don’t we have animals in our lives? Maybe it’s because you know in our space. Maybe it’s because we don’t like cats, but I want us to consider that if we don’t have cats, maybe consider the possibility of what they can do in our lives.

Okay, so again, that’s just a little practice. I want you to do the same thing. Okay, if you have your notebook or you can even think about this out loud okay, how can I use the word eye? How can I use the word new, the best speakers? They transfer this back and forth.

So maybe you maybe one person, said I’m going to Toastmasters at 12 o’clock news. I you and me when you’re doing your Table, Topics use a lot of you maybe have a pitch coming up. You use the word new later.

I gave this for prep and she talked about cats Lena. Thank you for this cat, though cute are /, evil, reason being the quiet and they move. Quite you know in a sneaky way an example of this. I had a cat a few years ago.

Who would wait under the bed for you to sit down and once you sat down he scratched and bite your ankles and make you leap off the bed? That’S why I believe cats are evil Lila that was convincing. You see how.

Why is that prep? Why do I like crap because, usually and our minds, you may have all these thoughts going on, but when you use a structure it gives your audience a good flow to just understand really quickly.

Okay, the last thing magic number three. What do I mean by man? Magic number three say things and just think of the number three you can use your you can use your creativity, here’s three ways that I use it.

I use the one earlier real estate, you know what they say. Real estate is about location, location, location, location, public speaking is about planning, planning planning. You see how I said it three times.

Well, you know what. If the King said, I have a dream. I have a dream. I have a dream. Okay, see the same thing three times. Cats are fun, fun, fun; okay, it doesn’t matter what it is repeat. It repeat, it repeat it another way you can use.

The magic number three is to say things. Three and three different ways: okay, this way you will be a little bit more convincing, look get the new iPhone because there’s not a new iPhone, get the new iPhone, because it looks really good hey.

I know you were taking you like to take photos and you like to improve on your your photo taking skills. Did you know the new iPhone? Have these three new cameras that you can try out? Okay, this another way: oh hey! The iPhone came out with this new color, that is a favorite color yellow you want to give it a shot and get that iPhone so again say it in three different ways.

Usually most people would say: hey get this iPhone. Get this iPhone get this Apple. We have one way of saying it, and, and usually it doesn’t hit people in the head, so use the magic number three. It can become really really powerful, and so, if you would love to get some practice time in try magic number three.

Okay, what are some three things that you can say maybe have a meeting coming? Maybe you have to meet a client later? What is that again, these things is to serve the idea. Okay, you can say things three times, but what’s the purpose of saying these things? Three times like, I want to tell you that public speaking is about planning, planning, planning, okay, let’s say you’re meeting a client, and you want them to understand that you want to build relationships right, there’s a relationships that matter maybe you’re.

Talking to that client – and you can say to them, pay our main focus our relationships, relationships relationships whatever it is right it just it we’re so busy. Nowadays, people have to get sticky things at the end of the day as this room that person’s about relationships, relationships and relationships.

I hope you are liking this so far. Okay, game plan, game playing game playing game plan. Where are you right now at these levels? Okay, where are you right now? I want to help you get from point A to point B, most of the time, people actually don’t know what to do with the public speaking.

So I need you to choose a point, a and then choose a point B. Maybe you are stuck in the head. The next step would be work on your presence. Okay, maybe you don’t take time to you, don’t take, maybe uses you want to be at clear memorable.

Maybe it’s being really good at being clean memorable. Maybe that’s the a and B right now, okay, so where is your a and where is your B and one of the best things about these game plans are when you hone down and when you know what you need to work on just work on these things.

For example, if you need time to become clear and memorable, don’t focus on the stories, you know don’t focus on try to influence people, yet you know, take small wins one at a time. Like anything else, you learned in life, it was probably the small wins that got you to where you are, and so like presence.

Maybe you have to work on your body language, your vocal variety. You can every single day just be a little bit more over there of you know your body language, and so you know, I think I think you showed up today because you’re frustrated about where you are with your public speaking.

Maybe you are stuck in head and it could be that you are so busy. You don’t have time to plan and you can’t be clear memorable or maybe that it’s just maybe some other people gave you feedback, and I said okay, you have to work on your public speaking.

Well, maybe you just wanted to hang out today, but I’m thank you. If you just want to hang out today, I just want you to know again that public speaking, it can really transform your life or the organization that you’re working with at the same time, because it’s just more than presenting to people, they even asked Warren Buffett.

What do you think is that one skill people should learn to become more successful in life and he said without a doubt mastering your public speaking skills will raise your value by 50 %, and I believe that, if you’re, you know if you’ve been on this call.

This webinar up to this point: you have what it takes to excel in public spec. You know public speaking, and this is something that you can get started with now. I know and you’ve been presenting before, but this is really the time to really step up your game.

I said to people it’s almost 2020 right. How can you really work on your public speaking game so that in 2020 you can be one of the best speakers that you can be? You know start trying to, and I want you to know that nothing that I shared with you here today is fluff and in theory this is exactly what I’ve done with my clients and myself to to really become a good public speaker, especially even just going back To the breath, I used that day in and day out and hopefully – and you can take a breath right now and after I helped so many different individuals with the public speaking even like you’re looking at these five levels right now, it is these five levels that People have to go through no matter if, if you are newbie or you’ve been at this game, it’s about taking baby steps again, it’s all about baby steps that can increase you, your love, o to the next public speaking, I’m gonna, say public speaking experience is

Source : Youtube

How To Master The Art of Public Speaking

Presentation mastery got one of the questions I get is what happens if I forget my presentation and I’m halfway through midstream, and I forget everything. How do I look really like? I know what I’m talking about.

How do I make sure that my audience is really engaged? Look: some of these subjects come up all the time around presentations, Dale Carnegie, of course, I’m William farmer from Dale, Carnegie, Australia, Dale Carnegie was fantastic and helped people out.

How would I present themselves how to do it effectively? In fact, he wrote a famous foot. Could the quick and easy way to effective speaking so here are a couple of those techniques from Dale Carnegie’s work, I’d like to share with you today now, if you are planning on doing a presentation and you were planning on memorizing it I’m going to give you A piece of advice: don’t do it, because what happens is you’ll start to really think about your presentation and every word.

If so it moves. The chair stands up to go to the toilet and you lose your place. All of a sudden, all the wind will go out of the sale, so don’t try to memorize your presentation. The other thing is that comes across a little bit artificial.

Now, with the beauty of PowerPoint, you can just flick and then the PowerPoint will come through and it usually reminds us of what the next thing is in our presentation: skills. If you don’t have a lot of PowerPoint slides good onya, because your PowerPoint slides should be there to actually enhance the presenter, not replace the presenter.

How many times have you been a presentation with its been death by PowerPoint? You felt like emailing them and saying just email me the presentation because it was just as effective. So if you are going to trade people’s time, that’s your wage or your salary and everybody else and above 20, 20 people listening.

I always think I want to trade their time with as much value as I possibly can so when you’re presenting your ideas, think about it. What’S the benefit to the people that are in the audience and if you do find yourself in one of those unfortunate events where you have got this full stop, and you don’t know what comes next? Here’S a couple of techniques, here’s the first one! First of all, don’t tell your audience all the time, we’ll lift our eyes show some fear and we’re telling our audience.

We don’t know what comes next, if I’ve been to just do look very wise pause, look, and by that amount of time I’m sure the words will start to flood out. The next thing just speaks because it’s like a segue, it’s like a bridge that connects to the next thought or asks a question of the audience and straight away by asking a question: looked in your hand, there may be someone engaging it stimulates conversation and it helps you to remember what you’re talking about all take your presentation into another direction.

If you are going to use notes, okay, make sure your notes are very, very clear, maybe six words, six words, six lines, no more! Nothing is to make sure it’s easier to see. Don’t hide behind a lectern, because what that does is it creates a barrier between you and your audience, use power points as a prompter.

I could talk about the subject for a long period of time, but that’s probably the key and regards to mastering presentations. There’S remember that you are the message and not PowerPoint and that when you do have that full stop use it to your advantage.

Don’t tell your audience that you don’t know what comes next. So I’m way, if I’m an engagement, specialist hey, how do you give effective presentations? Have you ever had that experience or you didn’t know what to say next? How did you handle it? Oh and if you’re an executive, what you like about presentations and what presentations are stimulating to you, I will have far more engagement specialists.

You can contact us, anh, dau, Carnegie com,

Source : Youtube

Overcome Your Public Speaking Anxiety With These Tips | Eric Edmeades

Not one person in this room was born afraid of public speaking. Nobody, no matter how fearful you are of it today, no matter how nervous you might get about it today, not one person in this room was born afraid of public speaking.

Nobody I am about to share with you one of my favorite things in the whole world to share with you. I have devoted this part of my life to giving people the gifts that I believe are the most valuable in the world.

I have been honored over the last three weeks that we’ve been here in Tallinn to have people walking up to me all the time and telling me the stories about how their life has been transformed from a health perspective, people are telling me about the weight that They’Ve lost and the pain and symptoms that are gone that their children have.

Even you know. I have had people come up to me and go after a month of watching your videos every single day my kids started getting curious, and now they want to change their food habits and so on, and I think one of the greatest gifts in the world you Can give anybody is their relationship with food? Is that true – and you know who’s trying to take away your relationship with food, the entire time, the food industry, and so that’s my job is to undo what they’re doing, and I love doing it and one of the other gifts that I really love to give People is the gift of communication, the gift of being able to communicate your thoughts effectively persuasively influentially, and the challenge is, is that our society has done everything it cannot on purpose just the way it is to train that out of us and and and I think That that makes life a lot harder to live.

I think some of you find yourselves having an intense conversation or a negotiation, and every now and again you walk away from that conversation and you think to yourself afterward. I wish I’d said this who’s had that feeling I’d like it to go away.

I’d like you to not have that feeling I’d like you to say the things that you want to say I’d like you to express yourself. The way you want to express yourself, I suspect that if you do that, it will change your relationship with you.

It’Ll change your significant relationships, your romantic relationships, it’ll change, your relationships with your parents, it’ll change your relationships, professionally, it’ll change everything, and, for those of you, are interested in getting an incredible professional advantage.

I’m talking the biggest professional or business advantage possible. What we’re going to do today is going to be unbelievably valuable, and I’m going to give you some of the sort of theory and science behind this now this is going to become.

This is going to be shocking for some of you, especially those of you that are younger. There was a time before the internet. I know I know and then and then this will be even more shocking to some of you that are a little older than that there was a time before television.

Can you imagine what did families do? Did they sit around the radio? No kidding families used to sit around the radio, and so what’s really shocking is there was even a time before the radio and what did families do? Then they sat around the fire, they sat around the fire and I have been privileged to sit around that exact fire and what i mean by that is that in my research for wildfit, i have had numerous visits with the hadza bushmen and the hadza bushmen live Very much the way most of our ancestors did for most of our history and they sit around the fire and – and i want you to think about something if you’re sitting around my fire a hundred thousand years ago, and i share a story with you.

I share a story with you and it’s entertaining and it’s engaging and it makes you think, and maybe it makes you laugh, but in that story i tell you about the time that these big white rhinos tried to kill me because they really did i’m not kidding You, it really happened to me and i’m standing there, and these big white rhinos are running toward me and what i knew about white rhinos is that they don’t have good eyesight.

In fact they barely can see, they can smell and they can hear, and so the reason they’re running toward me is that they could smell me and – and i knew as they were running toward me and let me tell you something: rhinos are bigger than you think Have any of you guys been in that cafe with the big white rhino head on the wall that is to scale? That is what a big male white rhino that’s the size of its head.

Then you add the body and and they’re way faster than you would think and when two of them are running toward you you’re, this is basically how it feels in your feet. They’Re running toward you and you’re doing this because they’re shaking the ground.

What does every inch of my being want to do when they’re running toward me run? But i know that if i run they’re going to hear my footsteps and that’s going to give them the ability to follow me and if i, if i let them follow me with those big horns, i’m gonna get some interesting piercings, not good right, and so Instead of running, i stood there and stared them down and waited, and they got about 15 feet from me and they stopped and they turned around and walked back into the bush, and then they got curious again when the wind shifted directly.

It came running again at me and then they got about 10 feet 3 meters and then they stopped again and they walked away. If i had run, i would be dead today, or certainly i would have interesting piercings one way or the other, and so imagine that we’re sitting around the fire – and i share that story with you and a week later – you’re off in the bush, picking berries doing Whatever you want to be doing, and two white rhinos come running at you and you suddenly remember: oh my god, i’m supposed to just stand still and you stand still and it saves your life whose fire do you want to sit around for the rest of your Life, do you understand? This is why we have this thing called the stage effect for millions of viewers, your survival and your ability to thrive was completely dependent upon the stories being told around your campfire.

It was the most valuable thing there was. Nothing could be more valuable than you sitting around the fire and hearing the stories and – and you started listening to these stories when you were two and three years old and by the way can two-year-olds understand, even though they can’t speak.

Can they understand everything they understand? Everything the other day, i’ve got my little girl here in tallinn with me and my little boy, who’s, not so little. My boy is 20 years old and my little girl is two years old, and so they don’t get to spend much time with each other and so they’re hanging out and i go to zoe, i go zoe, do you love daniel and she goes and i go Daniel’S your brother and she goes and i go.

That means daniel that i’m daniel’s daddy too, and she goes she understands it all and so we’re sitting around the fire listening to these stories and they are making it possible for us to survive the most difficult circumstances and they’re making it possible for us to thrive In the most difficult circumstances – and so our dna loves stories – that’s why hollywood will spend 200 million dollars making.

Do you understand that think about that? They will spend 200 million dollars, creating a story and they won’t begin to see any revenue on that story until after the 200 million dollars is spent it’s risky, but they know that we like stories.

They like we like stories because it is the primary operating system of the body, and once you begin to recognize that stories are the best way to write information in then you can look at history and recognize that it’s completely true every great revolution, every great revolution, Whether it’s a a political revolution, a war uprising, a technological revolution has been preceded by great speeches and great oration.

I remember reading that. Roosevelt president, roosevelt was trying to pass some legislation through the u.s congress, and none of the congressmen would vote for this because it had to do with changing their lives.

It was legislation about congressmen and they didn’t want to change it and he he was getting nowhere and then he recognized that the world had changed and he could speak directly to the people, radio, town halls, and so he started doing that.

He started giving speeches, and – and do you know what’s amazing – is when they put that legislation in front of congress. It passed with only three dissenting votes, because he’d gone directly to the people speaking is one of the most powerful things we can create in the world.

Look and by the way can powerful things be used for both good and bad adolf hitler gave 8 000 speeches. He knew exactly what he was doing. He wrote in his book mein kampf many years before world war ii.

He wrote in that book essentially that the microphone was more powerful than the pen. That speaking was more powerful than writing that, if you really wanted to stimulate people, if you really wanted to change their hearts and minds, you did it with great stories.

You did with great speeches. Speaking is one of the most powerful forces there is in our society. It creates an advantage in business and your professional life that is far past any other advantage here.

Let’S test out a few things: are you aware that in american corporate world – and i imagine this is probably fairly consistent in the westernized civilized corporate world in the american corporate world – people make slightly more money for each inch they are taller? Did you know that they actually make slightly more money, they’re more inclined to get the promotion they’re more inclined to make the sale slightly more taller and then, by the way, is there? Is there a gen? Is there a gender pay gap issue? Yes, and – and so there are all kinds of little tweaks in our society that are little optimizations – the gender gap pay gap.

How big is that? These days they say they say it’s about 10, it’s about 10, but if you remove the fact that, for example, it came out, do you guys know that uber uber pays male drivers more than they pay female drivers? Yeah? Okay? This is the way.

Statistics lie. Female drivers choose not to drive as many hours and they try. They choose not to drive during peak hours and they choose not to drive in dangerous neighborhoods and so uber doesn’t pay them any less.

Uber pays them exactly the same. They choose to do things differently. Women choose not to take jobs where they die. Women men die in the workforce, something like seven times more often than women do, and so, when you remove all that stuff, the gender pay gap closes a little.

It’S still there, but it closes a little. Does that make sense, but these tiny little professional advantages that height or maleness or or whatever they’re tiny, but the most massive massive advantage you can give yourself in in the corporate world and in the entrepreneur space is to be able to speak if an inch of Extra height can make you 0.

01 more income, being a speaker being comfortable. Sharing your ideas being influential in the way you communicate can triple or more your income, it obliterates all other advantages. It is the most powerful thing you can do for your professional life.

The problem is we don’t because we’re afraid and the crazy part of it is not one of you was born afraid not one of you now, because i understand this whole fear. What we did before you guys came in here this morning is we took 15 envelopes.

15 envelopes and we wrote in those envelopes a few words a couple of questions. One envelope, one word one question, and then we stuck those envelopes under don’t check, we stuck the envelopes underneath the chairs and don’t think we didn’t notice the bean bags we stuck them.

Underneath and in a minute when i say, go you’re going to check underneath the chair underneath the beanbag and you’re going to see if you’ve got an envelope if you’ve got an envelope, i want you to check in with what happens in your body and here’s.

Why? Because if you’ve got the envelope, you must not open it, you will simply stand up. You will walk over here. You will come up on the stage and then i’m going to have a handheld microphone and i’m going to hand you the handheld microphone and then you’re going to tear the envelope open and you’re going to see the word or the question and you’re going to speak.

For three minutes about that topic in front of this audience, i will tell you that some of the words some of the words one of the words, is orgasm. Another word another word: that’s in there is brexit another word.

That’S in there donald trump, so who’s ready go ahead and check. Okay, stop it. There are no envelopes, [, Music, ]. Now the reason i do that did you find an envelope. I do sometimes have envelopes, so they might be stuck under there.

The reason i did that is, there were a different. There were a variety of different emotions that came up in the room. Now i want a totally honest answer here. Please don’t worry about looking good. I want a totally honest answer.

There were a few people in this room that were absolutely genuinely excited about this idea, who were they wow welcome to mine valley university, because it is not like that out in the rest of the world.

That was a good 15 of the room in the rest of the world. In a room of this size, it would be one or two people and they would almost always be one of my clients. That’S how it is that’s how it is, how many people were like a little excited, but also your stomach was doing a little backflip thinking, routine, okay, all right and how many were thinking, i’m not the least bit excited and i feel like i might actually vomit Who was in the category and then how many of you are thinking? Please no, no envelope, i won’t do it anybody and then there was a couple of you that thought.

If there’s an envelope, i’m not pulling it out, [ Laughter ], i know, and so what i want you to know is that i used to be in the category of that. If i was sitting there in that chair and i found and i reached under and i touched an envelope, i would have immediately pulled my hand back and pretended i didn’t have an envelope.

I kid you not. I was so terrified of public speaking that if you called me on a friday, if you called me on a friday – and you asked me to do a talk, no, if you called me on monday – and you asked me to do a talk on friday, i would Absolutely have said no without question.

I don’t care what the topic, how big the audience was. I would have said no and when i said no, i would then have started feeling sick and i would have continued to feel sick on tuesday and on wednesday and on thursday, and i would have woken up on friday morning feeling sick and i said no, i Don’T even want to think what would happen if i said yes, that’s how terrified i was, but you know what’s so important about this.

Not one person in this room was born. Afraid of communicating. Not one person in this room was born afraid of public speaking. Nobody, no matter how fearful you are of it today, no matter how nervous you might get about it today, not one person in this room was born afraid of public speaking.

Nobody, it’s really important for you to understand that. Can you imagine what would happen if a baby came out afraid of public speaking? How would it ever get its diaper changed? How would it get food? What happens is at first when babies are born, we are so thrilled by their noises.

Aren’T we baby noises? I mean: aren’t they incredible, i i get home if i miss zoe’s bedtime like if i miss it occasionally i come home and she’s already in bed. I want to go wake her up. You can imagine my wife’s reaction when i say that i’m going to go away, i will never go wake her up, i’m going to go wake her up.

No, but you know in the morning now, when she wakes up she wakes up and immediately. She starts talking and she talks in some strange mix of english and spanish and now estonian and it’s beautiful and we love it and most parents do.

But then there comes a point in time after the age of three and four, where the talking isn’t so great, where you’re on a plane and the chill child is being too loud and that’s where you’re trying to go shh, [, Music, ] indoor voice.

Think before you speak, children should be seen and not heard, and it begins, and almost every person in this room was subjected to at least some of this stuff. When they were a kid and that’s where your apprehension of communicating that’s, where your apprehension of speaking came from, because social conditioning started putting a cocoon around you and started telling you to control yourself to not be so excited, is it true and and and then we Continue to live with that fear, we continue to live with that, and then it gets even worse because we go to school and one of the things that teachers forget teachers forget what it’s like to think like a child.

They do look guys when children are born. They have no meanings, they don’t know what stuff means, and so their entire job for the rest of their life is to assess meanings. Oh, i have pain in my stomach from hunger and when i cry i get fed.

Oh look at that. When i cry somebody sticks a boob in my mouth, wait a minute. Why did i stop doing that anyway? [ Laughter ], but the fact is that the children make a meaning they make a meaning and and and then they continue to make more meanings.

And the problem is: is that some of the meanings that we make when we’re children they become rules that we then keep? I shared? I spoke to the teens on the team track here at mein valley university. I spoke to the teens.

I told them a really embarrassing story, i’m going to share it with you one day i was eating an apple. I was eating this apple. I was about six years old and then i decided that i needed to use the washroom.

So i went into the washroom in our house. I went in closed the door. Put the apple up on the shelf, went in and did my business. I won’t act that part finished up. Flushed washed hands grabbed the apple, took a bite, open the door and walked out, and my mom was standing.

There now think about this. From my mother’s perspective, all she heard was toilet flush and son, walking out with apple in his hand that he was eating while he was in the bathroom. How does my mom feel about this? Not good right, so my mom goes eric.

You can’t do that and i said what she says: you can’t eat an apple in the bathroom and i said why not she goes it’s dangerous and then she got distracted and went off and did mom stuff and i’m sitting there with it’s dangerous.

Why is it dangerous, and this was this – was when i was six, so this was a few years bg before google, and so i couldn’t like go. Why is eating an apple while you go to the toilet, dangerous? I i couldn’t do that.

I i i, the question was just in my head and do you remember like, but back in the days before you could just ask the universe for the question like you did you ever have that thing where you had a question bouncing around in your head, bouncing On and it’s like the rest of your life kind of got filtered through that question, that’s what happened to me, and so i was sitting out with some friends one day and we’re at a restaurant and and and we have the straws you know, you’re drinking out Of a straw and – and we were doing like kids – do where you block off the top of the straw and you pull the liquid up and then you uh and you drop the liquid in right.

It’S physics, basic physics, it’s fun and then and then i was doing it and suddenly i was like oh wait. If you block off the bottom of the straw, the liquid won’t come out. If you block off the bottom and the top the liquid won’t come out.

If you block off the top, but you open the bottom, that’s the bizarre part right, you block off the top and it won’t run out the bottom. Maybe we’re the same. Maybe maybe the danger is that if you swallow and open the top at the same time that you poop and open the bottom, you just fall out.

[ Applause ]. I figured it out she’s right, it’s bloody dangerous. I won’t be doing that again. I’M telling you for months after that i could be chewing gum, just chewing gum and i go to the bathroom we’ll get rid of that gum wouldn’t want to have an accident.

You know where i slipped out of myself and so children children are doing stuff like that, all the time is it true, and so we forget that and so you’re in a you’re in a in a class and you’re teaching.

If you’re a teacher – and you want to teach the children a bunch of things, you want to teach them the curriculum, but you also want to teach them how to learn. Is it true and so you’re teaching the class, and you recognize that one of the students jb is just not paying attention all distracted by her recent nuptials she’s, just not paying any attention to my class, and so how am i going to teach her the lesson To pay attention, how am i going to teach her i’m going to call on her? You see what i’m going to do? Is i’m going to teach something like i’m going to teach the great story of the war of 1812.

? Most of you that are from america have no idea about this war, but this is where america decided to invade canada and take over. They invaded canada with numbers, seven to one seven to one. They invaded canada and, by the way canada burnt.

The white house. Did you hear donald trump talking about this recently? The war did not go so well for the united states and i could teach you all about how they invaded canada in the war of 1812 and then at some point during the lesson i am as the teacher going to go.

I have some questions. When did the war of 1812 happen and and a number of students are going to raise their hands, which students are going to raise their hands the ones that have been paying attention and know the answer? Teachers will typically not call on the children that have raised their hands the teachers when they ask you a question like that: it’s just a poll.

They just want to know how many of you got it, and so, if you raise your hand, they know you got it. If you don’t raise your hand you’re asking for trouble, i figured this out young. I taught the kids this by the way i taught them a trick.

I had in school, i’ll teach it to you. I went to school and i hated that because i didn’t like school very much, because i would typically pick stuff up on the first pass and do teachers stop on the first pass.

No, they teach it again and again and again, and it would drive me crazy. So i got into meditating, they called it daydreaming now. I know it’s meditating, but i i got into meditating and i would be doodling and meditating out the window and then the teacher would call on me and i didn’t hear anything and then i would feel like an idiot and i’d feel stupid.

And so i learned that if you do this in september, you can give yourself freedom for the rest of the year. What you do in september. Is you pretend to meditate you pretend to daydream. You pretend that you’re not paying any attention you doodle, but you’re, really listening and then she goes.

What is h2o and you don’t raise your hand, you pretend you’re not paying any attention and then and then she goes eric and you go water. You just do that. Two or three times in september, you’re free for the rest of the year free pass now the trouble is is that when children do this or sorry when teachers do this, what they’re trying to do is teach jb the lesson they’re going.

When was the war of 1812 jv doesn’t raise her hand jb when was or of 1812 jb wasn’t paying attention now in that moment, is she maybe going to get startled if she gets startled? What kind of chemicals is her body going to produce cortisol adrenaline, even and if she produces chordal, cortisol and adrenaline? Here’S something a lot of people don’t talk about, but the minute you start producing, cortisol and adrenaline you step back in time in your brain.

You go to the more primitive parts of your brain. The more scared you are, the more primitive you go. The idea is, is if you’re scared, you become pessimistic. It’S safer. That way you see if you’re walking along in africa, and you suddenly see some lion tracks.

That’Ll startle, you tell me it’s happened to me: it’ll definitely startle you, and in that moment every rock that could be a lion starts. Looking like a lion is that is that true, is that safer than mistaking a lion for a rock? Of course it is, and so when we have some adrenaline and cortisol, we become slightly more pessimistic and we lose touch with our proper brain, and so in that moment, even if she knew when the war of 1812 started.

The answer is in the question. After all, she might not know it is that possible, and so i go jb when was the door of 1812 and she’s like uh, 1814. and now she’s just done something called public speaking in front of one of the most difficult audiences in the world, children.

Children are the toughest audience ever. Children are not nice come on. I know i’m not talking about your kids, i’m not talking about my kids, i’m talking about the rest of them. They’Re, not nice. When, when are jb’s classmates going to remember, or when are they going to forget that she made this mistake when never jb goes off to palo alto? She starts the next big.

com company she’s a billionaire. She flies to her 25th anniversary high school anniversary. She arrives in a private jet, limousine picks her up, she’s got all the jewelry and the cool stuff and the great clothes, and she shows up at her reunion and she walks in the door, and they go look guys it’s 18 14.

, because they’re never going to Forget, but the real problem is, is that the teacher intended to teach jb the lesson pay attention in my class, but the lesson jb got that day was public speaking is freaking terrifying and for the rest of her life, maybe she’s nervous every time somebody hands her Microphone every time somebody asks her to do a toast or prepare a conversation, and this is what’s happened to so many of you as well.

At various points, i will tell you that i was so so terrified that it would make me sick to even think about speaking, but the transition i’ve gone through over the last 20 years has completely changed my life because of the stage effect i’m going to share Some things with you when i was 15 years old, i was homeless and when i say homeless, i should point out that i was living in a place called edmonton and it was winter.

Now some of you live in places that you think of as cold, but you’ve not been to edmonton. I will tell you that in edmonton in the winter time, it is absolutely routine for it to be minus 30 degrees, minus 40 degrees, and for those of you that are americans that are wondering what that means in fahrenheit, minus 40 is the same in both.

It means fatally cold and – and if i look at my life from that starting point, if i look at my life from being a homeless teenager on the streets of edmonton alberta to the things that i’ve achieved in my life since and i’ll, give you some examples.

Some of you know i i was invited one day to do a tour of the original industrial light and magic movie studios, for those of you are not familiar with industrial light and magic. It is the special effects shop that george lucas created to make star wars, and one day i was offered a chance to go, do a tour of these studios and when i got there, i found out some interesting things that george lucas had sold the studios to Some private guys that were running it for about three years and they weren’t running it very well and they were trying to raise money from investors for all kinds of cool movie, technology and 3d technology.

And and and i watched one of their investor pitches. And it was atrocious, i mean it was bad, it was, i mean it was like it was the don’t, invest in my company presentation. It was terrible, and so i’m sitting down with everybody afterward and i’m not saying anything because i’m just a friend, i’m just a guest here and then gavin my friend says eric.

What are your thoughts on the way? We should do this and i’m like gavin. I don’t want to offer my thoughts, i’m not from the movie industry. I don’t i don’t i don’t i don’t. I don’t want to do this. I wasn’t nervous of public speaking.

You see, i was just i just didn’t want to crash in on their party and then they said well, why does yeah yeah eric? What’S your opinion, and i said, do you guys really want the truth like? Do you really want the truth, and many of you will know this about me, how many of you have been to any of my seminars? Anybody am i nice, i’m not nice, and what i mean by that is that you might ask me a question and the first thing i’m going to ask you is: do you really want to know, and so that’s what i said to them.

Do you really want to know and they go yeah? We really want to know – and i said well, the presentation sucked i mean it was bad, it was really bad and they said why – and i said well because of this and this and this and this and then at the end of my talk, i just i Braced myself, because i basically expected them to kick me out and they said we have another group of investors coming in this afternoon.

Would you give the presentation no problem? I like i thought it was a big problem. What do you mean and i’m not kidding you? Two hours later, i’m standing on a stage in the george lucas, theater 140 seating, private theater, where thx sound was debuted and i’m standing in the cedar and there are investors in there and i’m giving the pitch and then the investors at the end of the pitch.

Here’S what they say if we invest, will eric stay and run the company, i’m on a tour [, Laughter ]. This is a very you know when you go to the tours and they try to make it really realistic. You know they’ve made this one really realistic.

In the end, the investors decided not to invest, and i got talking to my friends and and and i went to the owners one day and i said: look i think you guys are in a lot more trouble than you’re letting on and here’s my offer and I offered to buy the company and they said no, and so i flew home and i was living in the caribbean in turks and caicos and i flew home and i got a phone call almost the minute.

I walked in my front door and they said, would you come back and i said why and they go because we want to take your offer and i ended up buying the studio and the first thing we did after that was work on avatar and then we Worked on pirates of the caribbean and transformers and elysium and and then from that company, we started a really cool company that literally built life-saving technology for the us military, we say like literally saved lives, and that only happened because i had become comfortable with speaking

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